This is the part of our fatherhood series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.
I’ve been married to Beccy for 23 years and am a dad to two fast-growing girls (Finley aged 13 and Morgan aged 10). For my day job, I help run events and conferences. Most mornings before school you’ll find Finley and I on the South Downs walking our dog, George.
Prominent memory of your first year of fatherhood:
We read the books and went to the classes but nothing prepared us for the moment when we arrived back from the hospital and realised it was down to us. Friends and family became so important as we realised that we could not do it alone.
Best fatherhood advice received:
“If things don’t go according to plan, you aren’t a failure”. We live in a culture where we are encouraged to over-plan for something that is ultimately very different for each baby. The danger of setting rigid expectations is that we feel a failure when they don’t quite work out.
Message for men expecting their first baby:
Everything happens in phases. At first you think each phase will last forever – but it rarely does. Like most dads, I’ve encountered happiness, fear, gratitude, loneliness, anger, joy, guilt and many other emotions in equal measure and intensity. It’s all part of this crazy rollercoaster ride that is parenting.