Fatherhood in 200 Words #21 - Andy

This is the part of our fatherhood series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

11357046_10153294737395516_1058593320124940816_o.jpg

I’ve been married to Beccy for 23 years and am a dad to two fast-growing girls (Finley aged 13 and Morgan aged 10). For my day job, I help run events and conferences. Most mornings before school you’ll find Finley and I on the South Downs walking our dog, George.

Prominent memory of your first year of fatherhood:

We read the books and went to the classes but nothing prepared us for the moment when we arrived back from the hospital and realised it was down to us. Friends and family became so important as we realised that we could not do it alone.

Best fatherhood advice received:

“If things don’t go according to plan, you aren’t a failure”. We live in a culture where we are encouraged to over-plan for something that is ultimately very different for each baby. The danger of setting rigid expectations is that we feel a failure when they don’t quite work out.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Everything happens in phases. At first you think each phase will last forever – but it rarely does. Like most dads, I’ve encountered happiness, fear, gratitude, loneliness, anger, joy, guilt and many other emotions in equal measure and intensity. It’s all part of this crazy rollercoaster ride that is parenting.

 

Fatherhood in 200 Words #20 - Simon

This is the part of our fatherhood series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

I am a Church Pastor in Welwyn Garden City, husband to Sam, and Father to Joseph (6), Amelie (5), and Lucy (1). 

79c7c8ad-66b6-4cb0-92a6-412029efdf0d.jpg

Prominent memory of your first year of fatherhood:

The strange and exciting feeling of arriving home with Joseph for the first time and thinking “blimey, there’s three of us now living in this house”. It was a wonderful feeling but I knew that things would never be the same again. 

Best fatherhood advice received:

A lot of people said things along the lines of “Live in the present and enjoy the moment because they grow up so fast”. It’s so easy to get caught up in life and miss how fantastic having the kids around is, so am always trying to appreciate them.  

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Have lots of fun; don’t worry too much; don’t play the ‘who’s the best parent' game with other parents; get up 10 minutes earlier to avoid getting rushed and stressed on the school run; catch them doing good things and praise them for it. 

Fatherhood in 200 Words #19 - Jon

This is the part of our fatherhood series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

6bc0db7d-91e7-4ca7-8724-1aff92746c2c.jpg

My name is Jon. I am an Independent Financial Planner, Business Owner, an aspiring Triathlete and Game of Thrones fan. I am a father of two girls aged 10 and 7 and will this year be celebrating my 12th Wedding Anniversary.

Prominent memory of your first year of fatherhood:

Sitting up late at night with my baby girl watching sports on TV while my wife would get what sleep she could before the next round of feeding. I treasured those moments because it was just the two of us hanging out . Even now they are both a bit bigger I love finding those moments where it is just the two of us creating great memories.

Best fatherhood advice received:

Be passionate about things your kids are passionate about.  

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Make sure you and your partner spend time doing things you enjoy doing. We went to the cinema lots in those final few months before our eldest was born and am so glad of it now because it was probably 2 years before we got to go again and we have to be really selective about which films we go to watch.

Fatherhood in 200 Words #18 - Tim

This is the part of our fatherhood series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

FullSizeRender-2.jpg

I'm 38 and a youth and children's worker for a church in Islington, London and I've been doing this sort of thing for about 20 years. I live with my wife and two boys, Toby who is 4 and Asa is 2. 

Prominent memory of your first year of fatherhood:

I will never forget the time I was leaving my local laundrette carrying my eldest, Toby, in a sling. It was raining, so I paused as I left and opened an umbrella, and said to Toby “oh it's raining, we better put up the umbrella.” Just then this mean looking bloke about my age stopped and comes over to me. He just looked at me and said, "I wish you were my dad." 

Best fatherhood advice received:

All your children need to know is that they are loved. 

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Your kids will know that they are loved if you are able to be present for them. Whatever age they are make time to connect emotionally with them by doing things together. I've never heard a kid say they wish their dad bought them more stuff, but I have seen the sad effects of an absent or disinterested father.

Fatherhood in 200 Words #17 - Gary

12985445_10153558500586699_6805626356831209358_n.jpg

This is the part of our fatherhood series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

I'm married to Hannah and we have 3 children; Boy 12, Girl 10, Boy 7. I'm 46 and run two charities supporting people who are close to living on the streets. I'm a Manchester City fan, novice marathon runner and passionate about seeing people reach their potential.

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

Night times were hard, I remember sitting on the bed feeling totally out of control and not coping, wondering how every other parent had coped. But from the moment I saw him I loved him, nothing was too much trouble and I wanted to succeed for him. That hasn't changed.

Best fatherhood advice received:

When we found out we were expecting other people were so pessimistic and said things like 'enjoy your life while you still have one' but we actually felt quite ready. Only one person spoke positively to me as an expectant father he said 'You will love it, and you will be great at it.' It meant a lot to me to hear that.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Embrace it and enjoy it. It will take so much more than you expect but your efforts will be returned 10-fold. Love and respect their mother and let the kids know that you do. Ask people whose parenting you admire for advice and ignore everyone else. Don't be afraid to admit you're struggling - everyone struggles.

 

Fatherhood in 200 Words #16 - Mark

This is the part of our fatherhood series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

A few years ago for my 30th I climbed Base Camp Everest. It was pretty fun and epic. I love adventure and like to think I'm a free spirited chap. I have two boys, Matthew Jesse George Tate, who's 7 and Joshua Harry Tate who's 4, they're badasses. I'm married to the lovely Laura who is also a badass.

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

I found my first year of parenthood a shock to the system. It was really hard work and daunting. To be honest there was lots of it I didn't enjoy - the first year has been the hardest for me.

Best fatherhood advice received:

Kids spell love: T.I.M.E. More than anything else kids will crave your attention and time. They will feel valued, build self-esteem and grow in confidence the more time you have for them and it will help your relationship grow with them too.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Stick at it! I think becoming a dad was one of the best things that ever happened to me and I am glad I am one, even though at first it was a real struggle, it gets easier as time goes on and now I love it.

Fatherhood in 200 Words #15 - Piers

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

I'm a 36 year old father of one boisterous boy, who I look after 3 days a weeks, with another due any day now!  I live on the sunny south coast with my amazing wife of 12 years and run a small charity exploring the connection points between Christianity and Judaism which is heaven for a theology graduate. 

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

I come from a family of 6 kids, my sister had her first when I was 14 and my new baby will be grandchild 22 (I think…). But I didn’t have it all figured up when it became my son and my responsibility. My big epiphany from the first year was that it was going to be a long haul with a lot of opportunities to feel humble. Getting the mindset that fatherhood is a marathon not a sprint really helped.

Best fatherhood advice received:

The best bit of advice I got was from my dad, "no matter how tired you are she is more tired". The first couple of years is no place for feeling hard done by and bickering about who has done more/slept less etc. I made a conscious decision to always put my family before myself which sorted most issues from day one.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

It will stretch you and challenge you but it will make you at the same time. Fatherhood is a proving ground for men. I can't think of another place where you can leave an imprint so indelibly on another life. Oh and it is the most joyful, humorous, rewarding and fulfilling thing I have ever had inflicted upon me.

Fatherhood in 200 Words #14 - Pete

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

My name is Pete and I’ve been married for 8 years to Joey. We have 2 girls, Lily-Grace (5), Eliza (3) and have a baby on the way. I am 30 years old and work in a church with children, young people and families. I love music, squash and woodwork. 

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

That first moment you finally get to hold your baby! Your wife/partner has had this intimate connection with this child for 9 months or so, and finally getting the chance to really feel a connection with this tiny baby can be the most profound moment in your life.

Best fatherhood advice received:

Don’t underestimate the difference a child will make in your lives. It’s amazing (of course!), a wonderful experience with every moment to be cherished, but it’s also really testing. You will likely never have been so tired, excited, overworked and emotionally drained in your life. Talk about how you’re feeling.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Choose your first words well. I know this sounds dumb, because they don’t understand what you’re saying and all…but I chose my first words carefully and have tried to live out the truth of those words with my kids every day since. Start as you mean to go on.

Fatherhood in 200 Words #13 - Ryan

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

My name is Ryan and I'm from Brighton. I'm a Consultant for Reward Health. I love being active & staying healthy. I have 2 amazing daughters, who are 10 & 4. I am so proud being a Dad because we are so important and never forget that..

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

That I'm now responsible for this child.. No matter what my circumstances says, I Can do it. I'm going to be the best Dad.

Best fatherhood advice received:

Love your children. Regardless of what they’ve done in life, without conditions & without exceptions. A dads job isn’t easy. But its worth it. Every second of it.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Sometimes you are going to get in bed and feel defeated. You'll feel like you didn't do anything right in the day. you may feel like you're a bad worker, a bad friend, a bad lover and a bad father.

Life will always give you peaks & valleys. its how you handle yourself in the valley that helps shape your character & strengthen you for your climb back to the top.

Be strong and remember, you ARE a great Dad. Do not forget it.

Fatherhood in 200 Words #12 - Tom

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

My names Tom and I live in Watford. I’m 28, and have been married to my lovely wife, Lucy, for 5 years. Our little boy, Oliver, is a year and a half. I work as a Housing Manager for a local authority, and I'm a keen musician. 

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

Honestly, how much better it was than everyone said it would be! I was expecting to never have any sleep, have no money and no social life, and that wasn't the case. Instead, we became intentional about seeing family and friends, and making time for us as a couple.

Best fatherhood advice received:

Everyone gives you advice in the first few weeks/months, but I think my mother in law gave me the best advice. She told me to parent in my own way, and not compare myself to others. Parenting's not a formula to learn, its a relationship to build. 

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Don't panic! Yes your life will never be the same, but it changes for the better. Your life becomes about someone else other than yourself, and this is a hard learning curve. That being said, having another life entirely dependent on you teaches you about yourself, and realign's your priorities. 

Fatherhood in 200 Words #11 - Tim

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

My name is Tim Herriott, I've been married to Wendy for 17 years and we have 2 teenage sons, Matthew aged 15 and Alastair aged 14. I work as the finance director for a large local church and am also a self employed charity accountant. I love sport and lead a running club.

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

I think during my first year of parenthood what struck me most was the complete and utter dependence Matthew had on me (and Wendy) for his well-being. This helped me value my parents even more, as they would have done the same for me (this was especially pertinent as my Dad had died the year before)

Best fatherhood advice received:

Ensure no matter what that your children know you love them, and that they can talk to you about anything, anywhere and at anytime. (oh and love their mother!)

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy......…relax and enjoy being a Dad...... laugh as much as possible, don’t worry about not doing what you should do (I still make it up as I go along now!)

Fatherhood in 200 Words #10 - Dave

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

My name’s Dave Steell, I'm the leader of a community called One Church Brighton and I’m engaged in lots of transformational projects that serve the city.  I’m also dad to Jake who’s 15 and laughs at stuff as though he was 6, and Reya who is 12 but behaves like she’s 23, and I struggle every day with the wonderful task of trying to be a good parent.

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

The first year of parenting seems like a distant memory and I know it must have contained sleepless nights, messy nappies and all that stuff, but I remember very little of it, other than wishing I could have it all over again!

Best fatherhood advice received:

Easily the best advice I have ever received about being a good dad happened on a long walk, where all best advice is given in my experience, and it was from a friend who didn’t have any kids at the time but she turned out to be spot on.  She told me that even with the best intentions you cannot decide what you want your children to become, you can only create the atmosphere for them to flourish in and allow them to become who they already are.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

If you’re about to become a new dad I’m very envious of you!  My encouragement to you would be to make sure that you don’t wish any of the time away, even and especially the tough stuff because that’s where your character and the ties of relationship with your child will be most deepened.  It’s the oldest cliche in the book but time will fly and when these days are gone, they’re gone.

Fatherhood in 200 Words #9 - Matt

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About: 

I am Dad to three; Pixie (6), Olive (3), Otto (4 months). Husband to one (10 years and counting). Community Gardener. Micro Poet. Coffee Geek. Fantasy Football Fanatic. Trying to slow down, live simply and notice more.

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:


Missing New Year '09. At midnight I was inside comforting a 5 day old crying baby whilst everyone else was celebrating around the camp fire. I remember having this deep sense of 'this baby changes everything' and 'I wouldn't want to be anywhere else'. It was a real bonding moment.
 

Best fatherhood advice received:


Practice Presence. Everyone craves attention, especially children. It doesn't matter what you end up doing together. What matters is regularly giving kids your 100% undivided attention; ditch the devices, forget the to-do list and be fully present to them.
 

Message for men expecting their first baby:


Get your hands dirty, literally. Sometimes you've just got to man up and get stuck in; change nappies slowly, choose the 'wrong clothes', swaddle them badly, carry them in an unorthodox position, run the bath too cold... learn through doing. And don't be afraid to do some reading...

Fatherhood in 200 Words #8 - Tim

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

I’m an aspiring adult and work in East London for a charity called Spear. I’ve got 3 boys - a 5 and 3 year old and a 3 week old and a wife of 10 years. I’m an expert at starting things but not finishing them and particularly enjoy making new things out of old bits of wood.

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

A lot of the first year is a blur of tiredness, happiness and a realisation that it’s not all about you anymore. Leaving the hospital as a 3 rather than a 2 is a pretty stand out moment though.

Best fatherhood advice received:

Try not to stress. The milestones will come - your kids will be able to read, go to the toilet, use a knife and fork etc by the time they’re 18.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Enjoy yourself. I think that the more you invest in your relationship with your kid, the more you get out of it. You only have a few years of your kids being around and wanting you around, make the most of them.

Fatherhood in 200 Words #7 - Steve

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

Screen Shot 2017-05-26 at 11.53.47.png

After many years in the Telecoms Industry I’m currently assisting in the sale of a large telecoms projects. I have two sons (14 and 18) and a daughter (22).

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood:

I remember coming home with our daughter after several days in hospital, placing her in the middle of the lounge in her car seat and thinking “Wow, its just us two and our baby…” and thinking how scary that prospect was. The scariness soon past and we began the exciting task of “Parenting”.

Best fatherhood advice received:

Don’t look at other people’s children wondering why they appear to be perfect when yours are maybe not so well behaved, you don’t know what they are like at home. Its very easy to try and make your children fit a mould, don’t try… let them be themselves and encourage them to be their own character.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Parenting is something we make up as we go along, hopefully to the best of our ability – other than when we are so tired, or stressed that we don’t quite act the way we would want to - even at those times always try to treat your child the way you would want to be treated (whatever their age or yours).

Fatherhood in 200 Words #6 - Judah

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given. 

About:

judah.jpg

Homeschooling, single father of three children.

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood: 

That I am not enough.

Best fatherhood advice received:

Do not be afraid to ask for help, buy help (eg: dishwasher) or read about help.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Make sure you know who you are & you are happy with all that you see, if not make changes, as very soon you will become a role model.

The first months of fatherhood might be more important than we ever realised...

When I saw the headline 'MORE CONFIDENT FATHERS HAVE HAPPIER CHILDREN, SAYS STUDY'  it's fair to say my interest was, unsurprisingly, piqued. Some of the standout highlights for me include:

"A man's attitude to fatherhood soon after birth. This can influence later behaviour more than undertaking childcare and chores."

I take attitude and time to both be important, but it is interesting that this study suggests that attitude is the most important thing. At The Dad Course we're all about preparing and getting ready for fatherhood, something that isn't really on the agenda in the wider public (at least that's how it often feels). We do the practical skills, we learn knowledge but ultimately it's the confidence, hope and attitude that the guys go away with that is important. As a Dad you will learn to put on a nappy, one way or another (hopefully!), whether before or after your child is born, but as this study shows, getting off on the right foot is crucial.

"How new fathers see themselves as parents, how they value their role as a parent and how they adjust to this new role, rather than the amount of direct involvement in childcare in this period, appears to be associated with positive behavioural outcomes in children."

It's fair to say that becoming a dad is no trifling matter, it's impact is seismic, which is why we so often hear (unhelpful) messages like 'kiss goodbye to *insert thing you love here*', 'sex will never be the same again', 'be prepared to be knackered for *insert inordinately long amount of time*' and so on.

Becoming a dad for the first time is full-on, but my observation is that a lot of the horror stories/negative things people say possibly spring from a place of unpreparedness, or lacking confidence, of feeling lost, of not having healthy rhythms, relationships and boundaries. What we do isn't going to magically make everything amazing, but the more prepared you can be, the more likely it is you will enjoy and embrace fatherhood rather than simply survive it.

And that's why I think The Dad Course is good for everyone, no matter how little or much they know. Some dads go away feeling like they've learned tons of knowledge/skills they didn't have previously, while others perhaps pick up relatively less in terms of knowledge (perhaps they have nieces/nephews etc) but just as much in terms of confidence and preparedness (which is a whole other thing). 

We wouldn't attempt to undertake anything rigorous or tough without doing a lot of prep. If trekking across a desert we would check and double-check our route, ensure we had all the right equipment and knowledge, ensure we knew where to turn in difficult times and so on. Why shouldn't it be the same for fatherhood?

I'm so grateful for studies like this. They remind me why I do what I do and why it is valuable. It also keeps me going towards the bigger goal, to offer every dad-to-be the opportunity to prepare themselves for fatherhood. When I read a study like this I can't help but think how transformative it could be for men, their partners, kids and wider society if every dad-to-be was offered the opportunity to truly prepare for fatherhood so that they can embrace and flourish in it rather than simply get by. And that's what we will continue to work towards.

Will you join us?

Read the full BBC article at:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-38076493

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given. This week's advice comes from jazz musician Dan Forshaw, who lives in Cambridge.

About:

I’m married to Katy and we have two kids, a girl aged six and a boy who is about to turn four.  I’m mostly self employed and work as a musician and music tutor, running my own teaching website that has students all over the world, (including one in Antartica!) 

Prominent memory from first year of fatherhood: 

The most emotional, inspiring and tiring year of my life. Seriously, your world and everything in it gets turned upside down. You will find your emotional ‘compass’ stretched beyond belief,  in a positive and negative way. 

Best fatherhood advice received:

Go with your instincts. Everyone will have endless advice, but go with what you and your partner feel is right. The other thing is to prioritise your relationship. You will both face incredible strains and may have some terrible rows but stay strong and make time for one another.

Message for men expecting their first baby:

Sleep!  And learn that your wife / partner is going to be a very different person both emotionally and physically after the birth, don’t say the first thing that comes into your head, no matter how tired you are!

Fatherhood in 200 words #5 - Fraser

This is part of our fatherhood in 200 words series where we asked dads to share a little about themselves, their most prominent memory of their first year of fatherhood, the best parenting advice they have received and a message for dads-to-be. Each answer was limited to 50 words and you find them here unedited and as given.

About:

I'm a research project manager at the Department of Energy and Climate Change, mixing my time between working from home in Brighton and commuting to London. My baby boy is almost 1 year old. It's a great achievement to have got him safely this far. 

Memory of first year of fatherhood:

The roller-coaster sleep deprived nights. I could get/still do get totally frustrated and angry with him for not staying asleep, but then as soon I see him smile in the morning that all melts away. 

Best piece of parenting advice received:

Before he was born I remember other Dads saying attachment and love isn't instant and bonds take time to form. That gave me low expectations, but I was pleasantly surprised at how amazing it was when I did meet him... seeing this mini, cuter version of me was just awesome! 

Message to new dads:

Take as much paternity leave as you can!

Advocacy vs. Abandonment - 3 pitfalls for partners to avoid when using a birth plan and how to get it right.

Advocacy vs. Abandonment - 3 pitfalls for partners to avoid when using a birth plan and how to get it right.

I'm not going to lie, I felt a little scared about my son's birth. As much as I knew that birth can be an amazing experience there is also all that uncertainty and potential risk and the underlying essence of the thing which was that a baby was going to come out of my wife. Out of her. 

We had thought quite a bit about the birth, how she wanted it to be and how I could support her best. We were encouraged to put together a birth plan - basically some ideas of what we did and didn't want, preferences and hopes that we could share with the midwife who came to the birth. We found it a helpful experience but a word of warning - it's not a Christmas list, things don't always go perfectly and I think it's important to not cling too tightly to the perfect birth. 

That said, Abby (that's my wife, to the uninitiated) was pretty clear on what she wanted in birth, to be at home if at all possible, to have the environment clear and relaxed, with soft lighting and music - trying to create as calm and peaceful an experience as possible. To describe birth in these terms might sound ridiculous but it really can be possible. 

We were also both realistic about the possibility of having to go into hospital to give birth and although Abby was not at all keen on the idea of certain pain relief or having a C-section we were aware that things don't always happen as you hope so we ensured we also had something of a plan if this happened too. We also decided that if things didn't go as planned then it would be up to me to try and make sure things went as positively (I.E. as Abby would want it) as possible. With so many different possibilities that felt like quite a responsibility...

Read More